GuideCalm4 min

Breathing exercises for grief and low days

Grief sits in the body: a heavy chest, sighs that come from nowhere, a breath that catches. Nothing here will fix that, and nothing needs to. A slower breath can make the heavy hours a little easier to sit through.

What breathing exercise helps when you feel low?

A slow, even breath with no holds and nothing to get right. Six in, six out is the slowest even rhythm in Breathform.

Sit or lie somewhere you feel held: a chair with arms, the corner of the sofa, your bed.
Breathe in softly through your nose for 6 seconds. It doesn’t need to be big.
Breathe out for 6 seconds, as slowly as it came in.
Keep going for a few minutes. If you cry, let the breath go wherever it goes, then come back to it when you’re ready.
If 6 feels long, use 5 in and 5 out with the player below. Comfort comes first.

Do breathing exercises for grief help?

It can help with moments, not with the loss. The hour before a hard visit, the drive home, the 4am wake-up: a slower breath gives you something gentle to hold onto while you get through them.

There’s no research on breathing for grief itself. Reviews of breathing practice have found small improvements in how people rate their mood, alongside lower stress and anxiety, though the results were self-reported and many trials had flaws (Fincham et al. 2023). A review of slow-breathing studies found people felt more relaxed and less low, in small studies that weren’t randomised trials (Zaccaro et al. 2018).

So: a kind thing to do for yourself on a heavy day, not a treatment, and not a test you can fail.

A woman in a long cardigan sitting on a window seat on a rainy afternoon, eyes closed, an arm wrapped around herself — An arm around yourself, if that feels right. Some breaths are for holding yourself.

How well each breath is studied

Slow breathing (6-6)Some evidence
Coherent breathingWell studied
Humming bee breathSome evidence

Every study on this page (3)

Fincham et al., 2023: Pooled trials suggest breathwork modestly eases stress, anxiety and low mood compared with control groups, though most trials had weaknesses.
Zaccaro et al., 2018: In 15 small studies of healthy people, slow breathing was linked with feeling more relaxed and alert, and less anxious.
Vlemincx et al., 2013: Review and model: sighing is proposed to act as a resetter for both breathing and emotional regulation, restoring a balance in breathing variability and bringing relief.

Why do I sigh so much when I’m sad?

Sighing may be your body’s own reset. One research team suggests that a sigh resets both your breathing and your feelings for a moment, which is why it often brings a little relief (Vlemincx et al. 2013). So let the sighs come. There’s nothing to stop or correct. If you’d like to use one on purpose, take two breaths in through your nose and let one long breath out. There’s more in why do I sigh so much?.

Is it normal to feel a tight chest when grieving?

Yes, very. Many people feel grief as a weight or an ache in the chest, a lump in the throat, or a breath that won’t go all the way down. Tension and shallow breathing are part of it. A hand on your chest, a slow out-breath and a low hum can soften it.

Breathe in through your nose for 4 seconds.
Breathe out for 6 seconds with a soft hum, lips closed. Feel the buzz under your hand.
Carry on for as long as it feels good.

When the tightness feels more like anxiety than sadness, or you’re not sure what it is, tight chest anxiety goes further, including which kinds of chest pain need checking.

How long should I breathe for?

As long as it feels like rest, and no longer. Two minutes is plenty; ten is fine too. There’s no streak to keep and no wrong amount. Some days you won’t want to at all, and that’s fine.

If it’s been heavy for a while, talking to someone helps: a friend, your GP or a bereavement service. When worry is tangled up with the sadness, breathing exercises for anxiety may help too.

Questions people ask

Can breathing exercises help depression?

They aren’t a treatment for depression. In reviews, regular breathing practice was linked to small improvements in mood, mostly self-reported, and it can sit comfortably alongside other help. If low days have become most days, or you’ve lost interest in things you used to enjoy, talk to your GP: depression is common and it’s treatable.

Is breathwork good for grief?

Gentle, slow breathing can be a kind thing to do on a hard day. Some breathwork classes use fast, intense breathing that can stir up strong emotions, and people often cry. If you try one, choose a gentle style, tell the teacher what you’re carrying, and know that it’s always fine to stop and breathe normally.

Why does grief make it hard to breathe?

Grief is a kind of stress, and stress changes breathing: it gets shallower and higher, the muscles around your chest tighten, and crying makes the breath catch and shudder. Many people notice they hold their breath without meaning to. A slow breath with a long out-breath gently undoes some of that, for a while.

Can I do these breaths in bed?

Yes, and nights are often when grief is loudest. Lie on your back or your side, and use the hum: it lengthens the out-breath without counting and is quiet enough not to wake anyone. If sleep is a struggle, breathing exercises for sleep has a lights-low routine.